Tuesday, March 31, 2009

On this day in 1889, the Eiffel Tower was inaugurated… Apparently it’s most romantic at the top – Partly because of the view, and partly because you’re above the pigeons.

On this day in 1948, Al Gore was born… They say a few months later, his first steps looked like his current dance moves.

On this day in 1977, an Elvis Presley concert in Baton Rouge, LA, was postponed after Elvis failed to return after the intermission… Yes, Elvis had left the building prematurely.

Monday, March 30, 2009

On this day in 1989, Kurt Russell proposed to Goldie Hawn while they were presenting Oscars… Because she was only presenting, Goldie hadn’t prepared an acceptance speech.

On this day in 1867, America bought Alaska from Russia for $7.2 million… To put that into perspective, today you’d be lucky to get a switch-hitting shortstop for that.

On this day in 1945, Eric Clapton was born. In the 70s, people had bumper stickers declaring “Clapton for President”… Many folks became especially nostalgic for these during the George W Whitehouse administration.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

On this day in 1998, Shania Twain began her first headlining tour in Sudbury, Ontario… They say vinyl played a part in breaking her career, in her pants if not her albums.

On this day in 1988, Madonna debuted on Broadway in Speed The PlowSome pop celebrities use their influence to get Broadway tickets; some use it to get Broadway roles.

On this day in 1886, Coca Cola 1st went on sale… Back then the only way to have a “Diet Coke” was to pour just half a glass.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

On this day in 1973, because of Hollywood’s abuse of native Americans, Marlon Brando refused an Oscar Award… Some thought that in his later years, Mr. Brando looked like he’d never refused an Oscar Meyer’s.

On this day in 1995, Lyle Lovett and Julia Roberts announced that they were separating after 21 months of marriage…Hollywood marriage time is very similar to “dog years.”

On this day in 1974, a streaker ran onto the set of The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson… And for a moment, the audience stopped staring at Doc Severinsen’s jacket.

Friday, March 27, 2009

On this day in 1914, the 1st blood transfusion was performed… As medical fees increased, doctors asking for blood became quite common.

On this day in 1970, singing virtuoso Mariah Carey was born… Even as a toddler she could scream higher than the smoke detector.

On this day in 1998, the US FDA approved the prescription drug Viagra, the first pill for male impotence. The user is advised that if he experiences the effect of the drug for more than 4 hours, he should tell his doctor… While most many gentlemen would be tempted to tell everyone.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

On this day in 1931, Leonard Nimoy was born. He became famous as Mr. Spock on Star Trek, shocking us with his Vulcan ears… That was years before we became accustomed to Michael Jackson’s Vulcan nose.

On this day in 1975, The Biological Weapons Convention was formed, prohibiting the development, production and stockpiling of bacteriologic agents and toxins… Making today a great time to clean out the fridge.

On this day in 1950, Martin Short was born. Lately, he’s been on Broadway… But there’s no telling what his “Ed Grimley” character was on.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

On this day in 1947, Elton John was born. He still plays rock’n’roll… But now when he throws the piano bench across the stage, it’s underhand.

On this day in 1965, Sarah Jessica Parker was born. She starred in Sex And The City, a drama about a columnist in New York City who could afford to party at all the hot spots and buy all the shoes she wanted… Most New Yorkers call it “science fiction.”

On this day in 1967, The Who made its U.S. concert debut in New York… While their farewell concerts have been too numerous to mention.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

On this day in 1980, the Exxon Valdez spilled over 12 million gallons of oil near Alaska… Inspiring the bumper sticker “Friends don’t let friends drink and captain a 12 million gallon oil tanker.”

On this day in 1874, Harry Houdini was born. He was a master of escape… They say he could even get out of buying Amway products from his friends.

On this day in 1973, Lou Reed was bitten on his backside by a fan during a concert in Buffalo, NY… Some artists wouldn’t recognize fan response if it bit them on the ass…

Monday, March 23, 2009

On this day in 1963, The Beach Boys released Surfin' U.S.A It’s speculated that if they’d been from Wyoming instead of California, the song may have been titled Bowlin’ U.S.A.

On this day in 1983, President Reagan urged support for the Star Wars defense system against Soviet attack… More recently it was rumoured that Governor Schwarzenegger asked for weekend off to take Maria to a Star Trek convention.

On this day in 1994, Howard Stern formally announced his Libertarian run for New York governor… Stern’s campaign was unique because any potential scandals had already been exploited on his radio show.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

On this day in 1903, Niagara Falls ran dry, due to a drought… Most likely the majority of couples honeymooning there didn’t notice.

On this day in 1948, Andrew Lloyd Weber was born… It’s rumoured that Madonna breast-fed her baby on the set of Weber’s Evita… On the set of Truth Or Dare, it was her dancers.

On this day in 1923, the famous mime artist Marcel Marceau was born…
There’s some speculation that he was influenced as a child when he heard that kids should be seen and not heard.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

On this day in 1963, the prison Alcatraz was closed… Those unfamiliar with the facility should just imagine a Motel 6 carved in rock, with a really tough check-out policy.

Today folks of Riverside, IA celebrate the fact that they live in the “future birthplace of Captain James T. Kirk” according to Star Trek lore… Folks of Riverside, IA may have too much time on their hands.

On this day in 1806, the Lewis and Clark expedition turned back after charting the west… A sad percentage of American students think Lewis and Clark refers to a TV show about Superman and his girlfriend.

Friday, March 20, 2009

On this day in 1939, Brian Mulroney was born… Some say he changed the way Canadians thought… With him in office, some thought “Gee, maybe Trudeau wasn’t so bad after all.”

On this day in 1945, basketball coach Pat Riley was born. It was tough to say which designer his suits were from… But his hair seemed to be by Exxon.

On this day in 1969, John Lennon married Yoko Ono… Some Beatles fans thought that John was ready for a new prescription of his granny glasses.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

On this day 1791, equal rights were granted for French and English speaking settlers in Canada. Some still think Quebec should separate… Some believe that would shorten the drive from Ontario to the Maritimes.

On this day in 1848, Wyatt Earp was born. He’s famous for bringing law and order to Tombstone, Arizona… If he were alive today, he’d probably be an NHL referee.

On this day in 1955, Bruce Willis was born… While he was married to Demi Moore, they were both so busy that apparently some months he only saw her undressed on magazine covers.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

On this day in 1965, a Soviet cosmonaut became the 1st man to walk in space… He also discovered that sleeping in zero gravity meant if you drooled, it floated around the cabin.

On this day in 1850, American Express began operation… Before that, people were leaving home without it and they didn’t even know it.

On this day in 1931, the 1st electric razor was made in the US… Some think of it as the grandfather of the Brazilian hot wax.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

On this day in 1985, US President Reagan agreed to a joint study with Canada on acid rain… George W Bush supposedly thinks there’s a Prince song about it.

On this day in 1917, America’s first bowling tournament for ladies began in St. Louis… They say the ladies were attracted to the sport because it required picking out a set of shoes.

On this day in 1756, St. Patrick's Day was celebrated in New York City for the first time… The image of leprechauns as unshaven little men in knee pants just reminded some single ladies of bad dates.

Monday, March 16, 2009

On this day in 1926, Jerry Lewis was born… Some say in his early movies, his characters would be like a Jim Carrey with an oil slick in his hair.

On this day in 1802, the military academy at West Point was established… It’s rumoured that Britney Spears wanted to study there and major in “Marine biology.”

On this day in 1949, Erik Estrada was born. He played a motorcycle police officer on the 70s series Chips He was the only California Highway Patrol officer without helmet hair.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

On this day in 1966, Tom Jones won a Grammy for best new artist. At his concerts, female fans threw their underwear at him… These days, Britney and Christina perform in theirs.

On this day in 44 B.C., Julius Caesar was killed… Apparently eye witness reports were confusing because everybody was wearing a toga.

On this day in 1964, Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton were married in Montreal… They say Liz bought marriage licenses in six packs.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

On this day in 1879, Albert Einstein was born. He’s famous for pioneering the theory of relativity… And the Don King hairstyle.

On this day in 2003, Israel "Cachao" Lopez received the 2,219th star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame… At that point, the “Walk of Fame” was starting to look like a marathon.

On this day in 1999, Marilyn Manson injured his ankle during a show in Inglewood, CA… They say even the devil shouldn’t wear Prada if he can’t walk in them.

Friday, March 13, 2009

On this day in 1894, the 1st public striptease was performed in Paris… We now acknowledge this to be the forerunner to MTV.

On this day in 1939, Neil Sedaka was born. His hit Breaking Up Is Hard To Do hasn’t been covered lately… It doesn’t seem to apply to most celebrities in recent years.

On this day in 1961, 79-year-old Pablo Picasso married his 37-year-old model… That’s rather surprising until you convert 37 to “model years.”

Thursday, March 12, 2009

On this day in 1946, Liza Minnelli was born… Show business is so much in her blood, she not only sings in the shower, she dances.

On this day in 1974, Wonder Woman debuted on ABC-TV. Her power appealed to many female viewers… While her costume appealed to most male viewers.

On this day in 1996, the album Unplugged was released by KISS... In the 70’s, many teenager’s parents envisioned unplugging KISS.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

On this day in 1990, Mohawks in Quebec set up a blockade to prevent the expansion of a golf course, claiming it would disturb their ancestral territory. They resisted police and held out till September… Most golfers agreed that was the toughest hazard they’d ever seen.

On this day in 1969, a volcano on the island of Sicily started an eruption which lasted until mid-July… Cher’s had marriages that didn’t last that long.

On this day in 1930, Babe Ruth signed a two-year contract with the New York Yankees for the sum of $80,000… Fortunately, he’d never know that wasn’t enough to buy his rookie card in 2007 when it sold for $200,000.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

On this day in 1964, Prince Edward, youngest son of Queen Elizabeth was born… Apparently the toughest part of childproofing Windsor Castle was building the kiddy fence around the moat.

On this day in 1876, the 1st successful transmission of a spoken sentence by telephone took place when Alexander Graham Bell told his assistant by phone “Mr. Watson, comer here; I want you”… Today the same conversation on a 900 chat line would cost Mr. Watson about $10.

On this day in 1974, a Japanese soldier was discovered hiding in the Philippines, believing that World War II was still on… To put this in perspective, not only had he not heard about The Beatles splitting up, he hadn’t heard about them getting together.

Monday, March 9, 2009

On this day in 1936, Mickey Gilley was born. During the success of the movie Urban Cowboy, his bar helped popularize mechanical bulls… It’s been suggested that they resemble Al Gore line dancing.

On this day in 1562 in Naples, kissing in public was made punishable by death… More recently, many thought that Britney and Madonna’s MTV Video Awards kiss was to die for.

On this day in 1961, a Russian dog named Laika was launched into space aboard Sputnik 9… After that, being offered a car ride was just never the same.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

On this day in 1910, the 1st pilot’s licenses were issued, to an Englishman and a French woman… They say the lady accused the Englishman of flying on the wrong side of the sky.

On this day in 1971, Muhammad Ali was defeated by Joe Frazier… In an unrelated event, George Foreman went 15 rounds at an all-you-can-eat rib night at Sizzler.

On this day in 1988, the writers of American soap operas went on strike… They say that some fans couldn’t tell the difference.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

On this day in 1989, a convicted murderer in South Carolina who successfully appealed against being sent to the electric chair was accidentally electrocuted while sitting on the toilet mending a pair of earphones… And this was years before Alanis Morissette’s Ironic.

On this day in 1938, race car driver Janet Guthrie was born. She was the first woman to qualify for the Indy 500… By the way, it’s very tough to touch up makeup at those speeds.

On this day in 1876, Alexander Graham Bell patented the telephone… He had no way of knowing that it would fall into the hands of telemarketers.

Friday, March 6, 2009

On this day in 1923, Johnny Carson’s sidekick Ed McMahon was born… Ed was health conscious for decades, getting his daily fiber requirement from the orange pulp in his screwdrivers.

On this day in 1971, 4,000 British women’s libbers marched from Hyde Park to 10 Downing St… Some say the ones who showed up wearing high heels and miniskirts were asked to march at the back of the line.

On this day in 1475, Michelangelo was born. He painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in the Vatican while lying on his back on a scaffold 60 ft above the floor… These days it’s hard to find a good painter who does ceilings.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

On this day in 1961, the term “iron curtain” was first used by Winston Churchill in a speech in Missouri… Coincidentally, Martha Stewart supposedly recommends them to warm up any metal fabrication shop.

On this day in 1992, Michael Jackson was awarded a lifetime achievement award in Washington, DC, by the National Association of Black Owned Broadcasters… Back then, Michael was also black.

On this day in 1961, Alan Shepherd became the 1st American in space. He discovered the view of the Earth from space was breathtaking… And it was severely hampered by throwing a sneezing fit in zero gravity.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

On this day in 1971, 52-year-old Canadian PM Pierre Trudeau married 22-year-old Margaret Sinclair. Pierre’s perhaps best known for bringing home Canada’s constitution… While Margaret was best known for bringing home The Rolling Stones.

On this day in 1969, Chastity Bono was born. Years later her father, Sonny Bono would have to be strict when she started chasing boys… Fortunately, he’d already been through all that with Cher.

On this day in 1634, the 1st tavern opened in Boston. It was different than TV’s Cheers… Because in 17th century New England, many men wore wigs, not just the bartender played by Ted Danson.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

On this day in 1931, The Star Spangled Banner was adopted as the US anthem – A tradition which will probably last forever… As opposed to when it’s performed by some R & B singers at sports events, when the song lasts forever.

On this day in 1847, Alexander Graham Bell was born… Without his invention of the telephone, where would Superman change clothes?

On this day in 1991, Queen Elizabeth needed three stitches in her finger after trying to break up a dog fight at Windsor Castle… That was good practice for breaking up later fights between Sarah Ferguson and Prince Andrew.

Monday, March 2, 2009

On this day in 1969, the Concorde made its maiden flight at twice the speed of sound… Some assumed that passengers wouldn’t be able to hear the pilot.

On this day in 1949, Captain James Gallagher completed the 1st round-the-world flight at Fort Worth, Texas… In modern air travel, having the destination the same as the point of departure only happens with luggage.

On this day in 1969, Jim Morrison was arrested for profane behaviour… Considering the popularity of Madonna and Britney Spears, it seems Mr. Morrison was simply ahead of his time.

Sunday, March 1 2009

On this day in 1944, Roger Daltrey was born… They say he was so rough on motel rooms, instead of mints, maids left horse tranquilizers on his pillow.

On this day in 1954, Ron Howard was born… It makes most Happy Days fans feel old imagining “Ritchie Cunningham” going for a prostate exam.

On this day in 1969, Mickey Mantle retired, taking the Yankees jersey number 7 with him… More currently, the FBI may be retiring Roger Clemens’ jersey.