Thursday, August 6, 2009
On this day in 1911, Lucille Ball was born. She was one of the 1st people to become rich by playing dumb on TV… Since then, the act has been mastered by politicians.
On this day in 1890, the 1st execution in an electric chair took place… To picture it, just imagine a Lay-Z-Boy Bug Zapper.
On this day in 1497, John Cabot returned to London after discovering Canada’s Cape Breton Island, but thinking he had found Asia… That’s nothing, considering the entire population of California thinks it’s in Heaven.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
On this day in 1930, Neil Armstrong was born. He’s famous for being the 1st man to walk on the moon… Even though an entire MTV generation believes “moonwalking” was pioneered by Michael Jackson.
On this day in 1861, the 1st US federal income tax became law. In those days, a dollar went further… The trick became keeping it away from Washington.
On this day in 1936, Adolf Hitler left the Olympics in a huff after Jesse Owens won gold in the 200 metre final, disproving the Führer’s racist theory of Aryan superiority… That low rumbling we hear during the NBA playoffs is Hitler spinning in his grave.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
On this day in 1900, Queen Elizabeth, the Queen Mother was born… And suddenly, the Royal Family had more than the changing of the guard to deal with.
On this day in 1892, Sunday school teacher Lizzie Borden was arrested for a double homicide… Unlike O.J., if she tried to flee with a white bronco, it would have actually been a horse.
Monday, August 3, 2009
On this day in 1958, the USS Nautilus, the 1st nuclear sub, passed under the North Pole… And for a couple of week after, Rudolph had a green nose.
On this day in 1926, Tony Bennett was born. He’s perhaps best known for I Left My Heart In San Francisco… Actually, many people start misplacing things well before their 80s.
On this day in 1926, England’s 1st traffic lights were used… Which meant that British women drivers were suddenly going through more makeup.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
On this day in 1978, Neil Young married Pegi Morton… It was very formal - Neil wore a black bandana.
On this day in 1924, black American novelist James Baldwin was born. He wrote that civil rights problems derive from the insecurity of white people… The KKK’s opinion was that under their hoods, they’re as individual and secure as the next guy.
On this day in 1990, Iraq invaded Kuwait… At the time, apparently Saddam Hussein just thought of it as “the mother of all field trips.”
Saturday, August 1, 2009
On this day in 1498, Christopher Columbus mistook the American mainland for an island and called it Santa Isla… You have to remember this was centuries before Information Booths.
On this day in 1779, Francis Scott Key was born. He wrote the words to The Star Spangled Banner after a battle in the War of 1812. Later, the melody from an English drinking song was added… Maybe this is why it seems so appropriate for the start of sporting events.
